Like the best zombie stories, there is always a suggestion that there is more to learn and that if you think things are bad now they can always get infinitely worse. Apocalypse Cow is published by Doubleday and is available in both paper and ebook formats now. Dec 28, Erik Smith rated it it was amazing. One look at the cover, sporting a black and white bovine, with the glowing red eyes, and it was "To the book store, old chum!
Now, I have been burned by great looking novels, before. A fancy picture on the cover; an interesting premise, spelled out on the back; blurbs that would lead one to believe that you are holding the greatest story ever told. But these things do not a great novel make. It's almost enough to put one off their feed, as they say. Such is not the case, with Apocalypse Cow. Sure, it has the things mentioned above.
A couple of nice blurbs; a good premise killer cows, and the "unlikely heroes" trying to survive. Logan's writing is crisp and clean; never getting bogged down. He does a fine job balancing the comedy and the horror, with a little pathos and tragedy thrown in. The story flows well, eventually bringing together the disparate characters, and story lines, and builds to a great ending.
But, what elevates this book to the top of the food chain, is the characters. From Geldolf: the gawky teen, bullied by his classmates, forced into veganism by his mother, and crushing on his math teacher, to Lesley: the struggling journalist, who has the story of the year fall into her lap, to Terry: the slaughterhouse worker and lone survivor of the initial cow attack, Logan has crafted a fantastic cast of characters that you will love, and, in some cases, love to hate.
Oh, and did I mention Mr. Even in the middle of a cow apocalypse you need an evil government agent, who believes that the best solution to any problem is to shoot first, and make up the answers to any questions later. Gotta love him. Apocalypse Cow by Michael Logan: Bow down before your bovine overlords! May 08, Lauraloves rated it it was amazing. I was sent this book by the publishers, Transworld in exchange for a review. Now although this book isnt my usual genre, when i read the synopsis i really had to read it. This book is about several unlikely heroes who need to try and get out of Britain as the animals are turning into bloodythirsty zombies.
There is Geldof, who is born to hippy parents and is a vegetarian. However, as a teenage boy he is none to happy about this and craves meat. Their is Lesley, a journalist, although not a very g I was sent this book by the publishers, Transworld in exchange for a review. Their is Lesley, a journalist, although not a very good one who is the daughter of a high profile journalist and wants to prove herself. Lastly there is Terry, an abattoir worker who is one of the first to come across the virus in its horrific form. Together they must work together to get the proof out of the country and the formula to develop a vaccine.
One of the main concerns throughout the book is can the virus spread from animals to humans?
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And what would happen if it did. Now i am not a fan of zombies at all, to be honest the idea of them scare me and i dont always enjoy zombie books. Now this was good. There is a bit of Zombie theme in the book, but not enough to be scary. This was a very good twist on the very much overdone zombie genre. This book is very very good. It has all different themes to it.
It is very funny in places some parts of the book had me laughing out loud. For example when Geldof is having his teenage fanasties about his next door neighbour. Also it is quite a sexual book, so probably not one to lend out to youngsters, but very good for a more adult audience. At the same time, parts are quite gruesome and upsetting, but this is to be expected from a book like this. The overall thing that struck me was if this really happened the world would be screwed, Britain is a tiny little island and we could just be cut out from the rest of the world which was a bit of a scary thought.
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This book is seriously good, i would highly recommend it and would say. Read it :D Dec 07, Hannah rated it it was amazing Shelves: first-reads , reviewed. It sounded like the perfect ridiculous book to kick off my winter break and I wasn't wrong. If the premise isn't absurd enough a selling point, the characters certainly help. A lot of zombie media nowadays feature protagonists that you would expect to survive an apocalypse by When I found out that I won this book from First-Reads, I was totally psyched.
A lot of zombie media nowadays feature protagonists that you would expect to survive an apocalypse by the undead for various reasons, whether it be the rednecks who always seem to be the best zombie killers or the careful 'cowardly' type with a stronger sense of self-preservation. These characters are the ones we never hear about because they're usually the first to die, but their quirks somehow manage to constantly get them into and out of trouble throughout the book The fact that most of it was totally believable despite or maybe because of? It must be terrorists, who obviously do not have the technology for it, don't be silly, the government would never lie about that.
Who best to spread this disease as quickly as possible? The animals we eat every day and the pets in our homes, who outnumber us a million to one. What's the immediate reaction from the rest of the world? Shoot down anyone who might try to get off the island and leave everyone to their horrible fates. Don't get me wrong, the chapter titles are punny and there's definitely a lot of humour, but there's still such a thing as too much hype.
Its about zombie cows, I can already see that it's going to be hilarious, don't oversell it. Overall though, wonderfully entertaining read. I need more books like this in my life. This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here. And nope. AND more nope.
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I understand that it's supposed to be cheesy and B movieish. I went into this book expecting that.
I actually like those kinds of books when they are done well but this one IMO was not. I completely do not understand all of the high reviews. I know opinions are like assholes and all that but I can't believe this many people enjoyed something that I just find really terrible. The characters are all just a little too ridiculous. A little too much.
Too contrived and n Nope. Too contrived and not realistic at all. At least I hope there are not really people out there like this. I believe the key to making a successful book of this sort is in making the completely unbelievable seem plausible. This book completely failed at that. The humorous moments are obvious and contrived and quite frankly a lot of them are just really disgusting and not funny. There are also numerous situations in which the characters behave in ways that are completely not in keeping with the situation.
A failed recipe. Juvenile writing involving the main character and his infatuation subplot. Just gross. So to sum it all up I basically just really disliked everything about this book and read all the way to page because I really really really wanted to give it a fair shake and hoped it would grow on me, but the further I got, the more I hated it so I am finally throwing in the towel. Just not for me at all. Shelves: lt. Apocalypse Cow offered all the quirky humour I expected from a Terry Pratchett Prize winner with a pun for a title, and then it gave me a lot more.
It's actually a good apocalypse story - thrilling and shockingly credible. It's gross enough at some points to have made me turn my head from the book as if that helps. It's like all the people I love best - dark, smart, funny, and a bit disturbing. Apr 25, David Logan rated it it was amazing. For me, the fundamental rule for reviewing is objectivity — or, as much objectivity as possible given that reviewing can be a subjective business. The plot of Apocalypse Cow is straig For me, the fundamental rule for reviewing is objectivity — or, as much objectivity as possible given that reviewing can be a subjective business.
The plot of Apocalypse Cow is straight forward enough: A virus that turns animals into zombies escapes a research facility in the shape of a horny, carnivorous bovine. Horny, but unwillingly carnivorous vegetarian Geldof and his motley crew must, not so much save the day as save themselves from a variety of four legged sex machines that want to shag first and eat more or less simultaneously. Since the three main characters are a trio of losers, the reader wonders who the hero might turn out to be. The books strong points are supposed to be its unashamed daftness and bawdy humour.
How could zombie farm animals bring a tear to the eye, for example? Well … Michael Logan made it happen … and with a stiffy and a teenage nose in cleavage at the same time. Apocalypse Cow might become a classic of its kind. In years to come a band of octogenarian dope fiends on some Island off the Scottish coast might revere it as their bible. Meanwhile, I think this novel will appeal most to a younger generation, say, fifteen to thirty and predominantly male.
And the verdict? Is the novel successful in doing what it set out to do? An unqualified, yes. May 09, Jo Bennie rated it really liked it Shelves: l. If you like Mars Attacks you'll love this. A hilarious and completely sick thriller in which a deadly virus is unleashed on Britain, via a lab in Milgavie. An infected cow turns up at a nearby slaughterhouse and chaos ensues. The virus gives the cows a taste for blood, for raping anything they catch and enhanced strength and resiliance, they are harder to kill than a normal animal. And the virus can be passed on to any land based animal except humans.
Cue killer squirrels, bunnies and sheep, out If you like Mars Attacks you'll love this. Cue killer squirrels, bunnies and sheep, out for revenge on the people who have exploited and hunted them for thousands of years. The only hope for mankind are a rash infested horny teenager, his vegan ecowarrior parents and their new money neighbours, an escapee worker from the abbatoir and an inept journalist. As Europe closes its borders the small band travel from London to the Channel Tunnel in an attempt to escape the virus before it mutates and infects humans.
Living in Scotland did help, I understand the ironies of a peace loving hippie living in Cumbernauld and of yobs getting their comeuppance in Easterhouses when their muscle dogs get their revenge. This is one of those books that is so unfunny it's hilarious, the satire is biting and spot on, the ironies pile on top of each other.
May 17, Tim Roast rated it it was amazing. Apocalypse Cow is a book about a viral epidemic in Britain that first infects cows, then other animals and then humans. It makes them turn into zombie-like creatures and it falls upon three individuals — hemp-allergy sufferer Geldof, abattoir worker Terry and failed journalist Lesley — to help the world put an end to it. Together they attempt to escape the hordes of infected animals, the efforts of the army to put them into camps and the pursuit of one crazed man who is trying to conceal the tru Apocalypse Cow is a book about a viral epidemic in Britain that first infects cows, then other animals and then humans.
Together they attempt to escape the hordes of infected animals, the efforts of the army to put them into camps and the pursuit of one crazed man who is trying to conceal the truth whilst Britain is shut off from the rest of the world. This is a very visual novel with vivid images coming into the head from the descriptions on the page. The characters are very OTT, as are the situations, which makes for a lot of the humour.
In fact the book is all about the humour although there is a strong story also running through it.
Jul 05, Ami rated it really liked it Shelves: zombies , horror , library-book , don-t-own , creature-features , wtf , post-apocalypse. This was an interesting story. I loved the idea of zombie animals! I just had one problem with it. If you are very sensitive to animal cruelty, the first pages will be a little hard to get through.
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There are multiple descriptions of what goes on at a slaughter house, pets are heartlessly thrown out of houses due to fear of the virus I could never do that! Over all, the story felt fresh and unique, and after a few hard to read animal scenes, it This was an interesting story. Over all, the story felt fresh and unique, and after a few hard to read animal scenes, it was hard to put the book down.
Apr 15, David Biondi rated it it was amazing Shelves: horror , zombies , post-apocolypse. I really liked this book. At first I was expecting that it was going to be more humorous than serious but after a few chapters and I realized that it was in fact a serious zombie novel with just a few funny parts in it. It has a lot of action and a nice new take on the whole zombie apocalypse.
If you enjoy zombie books I highly suggest you check this book out. It was really good! Aug 23, Donna rated it really liked it. This was a great read. It's not often you can go from laughing out loud to cringing in genuine horror and disgust within one paragraph. If you like comedic horror and great characters, this one is for you. Highly recommended. Oh, and I've just found out there's a sequel coming, too. Aug 22, Michael McCarty rated it really liked it. Day of The Animals meets Monty Python I loved it.
Jul 06, George Morrison rated it liked it. Apocalypse Cow is a good summer read, with plenty of action and wry humor to keep it moving through an otherwise standard 'zombie apocalypse' plot. It is a tad predictable, following the well-rutted path of all of the other zombie stories that have been published. That is a shame, as the title suggests a tie-in with Conrad's Heart of Darkness via the movie Apocalypse Now , which never materializes.
With a little work, the story could have leveraged that classic work and elevated itself well abo Apocalypse Cow is a good summer read, with plenty of action and wry humor to keep it moving through an otherwise standard 'zombie apocalypse' plot. With a little work, the story could have leveraged that classic work and elevated itself well above the rest of the genre like a pole vaulter fleeing a herd of mad holsteins.
Of course, in that case I would have demanded better character development with less reliance on stock character types.
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When livestock in the UK starts to literally bite back, everyone is screwed! But when the cows fight back one afternoon, Terry finds himself at the center of a massive conspiracy. He wakes after the event to find that he's survived but is now being held prisoner by one of the men behind the virus that's infected the beast When livestock in the UK starts to literally bite back, everyone is screwed! He wakes after the event to find that he's survived but is now being held prisoner by one of the men behind the virus that's infected the beasts.
Geldof is one of those teens who can't seem to catch a break. On top of all the usual teen problems, his parents are weird - mom's a militant vegan and dad's a huge pot head who's rarely sober enough to know what's going on. Then Geldof narrowly escapes his own cow attack. A rolling stone!! Unleash hell with Katanas, Bazookas or exotic options like the Shrinker or Mjolnir!
You think you can beat our times? Local Co-Op - beat the story with a friend! Finding ways to kill him is optional. Full speech! Wallpapers p. Bart is ecstatic until Lisa informs him that the next step is to send Lou to a slaughterhouse. Bart tries to convince Marge and Homer to buy the bull, but knowing by experience how expensive it is to care for a large animal, they refuse.
That night, Bart hears mooing as he lies in bed and believes it to be a hallucination caused by his inability to help Lou. He starts yelling in fear, and Lisa arrives and says it is simply his subconscious telling him to stop eating meat.
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Nevertheless, Bart, Lisa, and Lisa's friends, "Compost" and "Solar Panel", go to the slaughterhouse in the middle of the night, determined to save Lou. They discover that Lou, who has been fed growth hormones , is now much bigger, so they use a forklift to pick him up and carry him away though not without some trial and error. Hurrying from the slaughterhouse, they decide the only safe place they can take him is to Mary's home, which is on a farm. The next morning, they are shocked to discover that Cletus Spuckler is Mary's father. Bart gives the cow to Mary, and Mary agrees to take it.
Cletus then yells for Brandine to come to the door. When Brandine learns that Bart offered Mary the cow, she informs them that the giving of a cow constitutes a formal proposal of arranged marriage. Against the wishes of both Bart and Mary, Cletus and Brandine plan the wedding for the next day; Lisa convinces Bart to go along with it long enough to let them figure out a way to save Lou, correctly suspecting that Cletus will not keep the bull if Bart refuses.
Upon learning what has happened, Homer and Marge are shocked, and Marge devises a scheme to prevent it, but she also agrees to save Lou, knowing how Bart rarely cares about anyone or anything. The next day, Marge arrives to stop the wedding, prompting Cletus to send Lou to the slaughterhouse. However, the "Lou" Cletus sent was actually Homer in disguise, while the real Lou is being sent to India to be treated like a god. They save Homer from the slaughterhouse after a close shave, after which Homer vows to cut back on his meat eating, and Bart reflects with pride that he can finally say that, "I had a cow, man.
The episode's title is a reference to the film Apocalypse Now. On the way to Shelbyville, Bart questions Homer's story about Dean Martin , as it does not match with his Wikipedia entry. Homer replies calmly, "Don't worry about Wikipedia , son. When we get back, we'll change it. We'll change a lot of things.
The scene in which Bart is driving the combine contains a theme song from The Comancheros. The training of Lou punching meat is similar to a scene in Rocky. Spider Pig makes an appearance in the episode, as a present at Bart and Mary's wedding. The music playing in the pre nuptial party is a yokel version of " Pachelbel's Canon ", one of the most famous pieces of wedding music.